The World Fucking Hates Me.

The world fucking hates me. I don't know what I have done that is so bad lately, or in a previous life, but the world is totally out to screw with me, because a thousand non-coincidental things have happened to me today. Why me?

I went out to Finke on the weekend, and as punishment for having a fun time, the world decided to give me the flu. It wasn't even that bad to begin with. It felt like it was going away yesterday, then BAM! this morning I felt like I was on my fucking deathbed or something. Basically coughing up my lungs, breathing through my mouth (because I couldn't breathe through my nose, which is something I really hate, because when you're breathing through your mouth the whole night, you wake up with the SOREST THROAT OF YOUR LIFE! the next morning.) Totally bogus, right? 

A couple hours ago I thought I was getting a headache, which sort of freaked me out, because one of the symptoms of swine flu is a headache. But this ache was coming further back and to the left side of my head... from my fucking ear. Yeah, I had a fucking ear ache. Something I have never had in my entire life. So now when I cough, sneeze or blow my nose, my ear is in unbelieveable pain. Funnnn.

You know how when you're sick, you're weak and everything hurts? Well my back really hurts, and my neck feels like I slept with it in the wrong position all night, so I'm unable to to turn it to the left without it feeling like knives are being driven through the back of spine. Also super-fun.

Well, since I've been sick I've basically been lying in the loungeroom watching Avatar and One Tree Hill all day, and Mommy Dearest comes in and starts abusing me because I'm running up the electricity bill. What the fuck else do you expect me to do? Run a marathon? Plant some fucking trees? I'm sick for Christ's sake; there's not much else I can do. 

But the world is still not done with inflicting misery and pain on me. It decided to use my gender against me, and give me the fucking cramps. What the fucking fuck? And then, out of fucking nowhere my nose begins to bleed. I have a fucking. blood. nose.

So I get up out of lounge, my back and neck in pain, my ear aching, my cramps feeling like they're ripping out my insides, and blood pooling in my hands. (Yeah, it's a pretty image right?) 

My god, the world fucking hates me.